Things I never thought I would say...

-Don't kiss the cat's butt.

-Yes, those are Mama's boobs. We don't squeeze them in public.

-Don't smell the cat's butt.

-Yes, those are your nipples. Gentle.

-Stop poking the cat in the eyes.

-I can't believe you pooped in the tub!

-Get your fingers out of the cat's ears.

-And finally, we don't use your toothbrush to clean the toilet.

Motherhood sure does change your vocabulary.